This month's Song and Story are dedicated to the sweet, inspiring life of Alexander Haws, 2003-2007.
TOPIC: A little boy in the final stages of cancer
For this month's song, I have been racing against the ticking clock of cancer. And while I have been doing so, a whole town in western New York has been rallying around one dear little boy.
| "Fly" - Free Download |
UPDATE
Alex Haws died of a rare form of liver cancer on Wednesday, October 24 at 4:15 PM.
The write-up below was written and ready to publish earier that same day, and I have opted to leave it in its original form, written when Alex was still alive.
Alex Haws died of a rare form of liver cancer on Wednesday, October 24 at 4:15 PM.
The write-up below was written and ready to publish earier that same day, and I have opted to leave it in its original form, written when Alex was still alive.
Alex Haws (almost 5). As I write he has only weeks to live. STORY: THE SONG PROJECT TAKING SHAPE
Alex's mom, Aimee, asked if I could write a song for the anticipated memorial service of her son Alex. Alex is in the final stages of cancer and Aimee is heart-broken, and was looking for ways to help her family move forward despite an overwhelming sadness and pain. We conceived of a song together.
The project had multiple layers behind it, because...
Alex's mom, Aimee, asked if I could write a song for the anticipated memorial service of her son Alex. Alex is in the final stages of cancer and Aimee is heart-broken, and was looking for ways to help her family move forward despite an overwhelming sadness and pain. We conceived of a song together.
The project had multiple layers behind it, because...
- Aimee was also holding onto the hope that if the song were completed quickly enough, it could not only be used at Alex's memorial service, but also shared with Alex while he is still alive. Our thought as we talked was that the song could perhaps be worded in such a way that it might bring Alex some understanding and some peace, now, around what is about to happen to him, soon
- Aimee has also been overwhelmed with gratitude by the way the community has come together around Alex's final birthday celebration and wanted a way to thank and acknowledge her town of Lockport, NY for all they have done. (See Alex on TV, see newpaper story, see Alex's family site)
- And finally, Aimee had a vision that, at the memorial service, doves could be released as this song played. Through her tears she explained that she wanted a song that could honor and celebrate the idea of flight, and of peace.
THE SONG COMING TOGETHER
I never wrote a song this fast in my life. Something in me told me to PUSH, PUSH, PUSH and not stop till this was complete. The world around me held still while I dove in, and it seemed that with every step I took, and with every phone call I made to musicians and support folks, coincidences happened, availabilties were abundant, and doors just seemed to open. The finished rough cut was listened to by Aimee, her husband Brian, and Aimee's mom, and all three were moved to tears as they took it in together. What I learned from Aimee, and what I wove into the song, was that for the last three years, Alex has been in the hospital more than he has been out of it. And despite having Alex's little sister Danielle in their lives to care for, Aimee and Brian have together found ways to have one of them stay with Alex every single night that he has been in the hospital. Being in Alex's presence has taught Aimee, she told me, about a kind of strength within her son, and within herself, that she had never know about before. Amy is young (27) to have faced so much, and both she and Brian have struggled to stay employed throughout this ordeal. And yet, no matter what, they have put love first, and never left a sick lttle boy alone.
All of this is reflected in the verse:
I never wrote a song this fast in my life. Something in me told me to PUSH, PUSH, PUSH and not stop till this was complete. The world around me held still while I dove in, and it seemed that with every step I took, and with every phone call I made to musicians and support folks, coincidences happened, availabilties were abundant, and doors just seemed to open. The finished rough cut was listened to by Aimee, her husband Brian, and Aimee's mom, and all three were moved to tears as they took it in together. What I learned from Aimee, and what I wove into the song, was that for the last three years, Alex has been in the hospital more than he has been out of it. And despite having Alex's little sister Danielle in their lives to care for, Aimee and Brian have together found ways to have one of them stay with Alex every single night that he has been in the hospital. Being in Alex's presence has taught Aimee, she told me, about a kind of strength within her son, and within herself, that she had never know about before. Amy is young (27) to have faced so much, and both she and Brian have struggled to stay employed throughout this ordeal. And yet, no matter what, they have put love first, and never left a sick lttle boy alone.
All of this is reflected in the verse:
Some people are strong inside, but I've known none as strong as you
You taught me that strong inside is something I could become too
And all of those long, long nights when you let me lay be you
Have filled me with love inside of a kind I never knew
Till I loved you
So take that love and Fly...
ALEX'S FINAL DAYS - AND A WAY YOU CAN HELP IF YOU WANT TO
I was moved enough by this story, and by my knowledge that Aimee and Brian are in a very difficult financial situation, that I donated all of my time on this project. Eric Kilburn (guitar, mandolin) and Larry Luddecke (keyboards) also kindly donated much of their time. But studio costs are significant, and Aimee and Brian will be spreading out the cost of the studio sessions by paying them out over the next six months, likely many months after Alex is gone. If any of you out there feel called to help, please email me. In my new adventures in giving, I have begin practicing the concept of "Pay it Forward." Therefore, any dollars received for this project in excess of the studio fees needed will go toward funding the next pro bono song I offer up, to yet someone else who has a story calling out, without the funds to support it in its entirety. (Sorry, dear readers, to be reaching out to you on Aimee and Brian's behalf. I promse this will not become a regular feature of my monthly write-ups. This story just really grabbed me, and I found myself becoming a part of it. I heard Alex crying out to his mother while we were doing a phone interview for this song, and I was just reminded of how deep hurt can run, and how much so many of us have to give.)
I was moved enough by this story, and by my knowledge that Aimee and Brian are in a very difficult financial situation, that I donated all of my time on this project. Eric Kilburn (guitar, mandolin) and Larry Luddecke (keyboards) also kindly donated much of their time. But studio costs are significant, and Aimee and Brian will be spreading out the cost of the studio sessions by paying them out over the next six months, likely many months after Alex is gone. If any of you out there feel called to help, please email me. In my new adventures in giving, I have begin practicing the concept of "Pay it Forward." Therefore, any dollars received for this project in excess of the studio fees needed will go toward funding the next pro bono song I offer up, to yet someone else who has a story calling out, without the funds to support it in its entirety. (Sorry, dear readers, to be reaching out to you on Aimee and Brian's behalf. I promse this will not become a regular feature of my monthly write-ups. This story just really grabbed me, and I found myself becoming a part of it. I heard Alex crying out to his mother while we were doing a phone interview for this song, and I was just reminded of how deep hurt can run, and how much so many of us have to give.)
Some people live many years upon this earth
And others like you my boy stay shorter
But after your time is through, there is more in store for you
For love is the key that will hold us together, after you
(Dove release: 1 dove) Fly up to the sky where you can soar above this town
Fly up to the sky where you can always look down
On the house where you lived and the people who love you here
Where we’ll stand on the ground and we’ll whisper our love to the air up there
Where you’ll fly, where you’ll play
Where we’ll remember every day
Some people are strong inside, but I’ve known none as strong as you
You’ve taught me that strong inside is something I could become too
And all of those long, long nights, where you let me lay by you
Have filled me with love inside, of a kind I never knew
Till I loved you, so take that love and
(Dove release: 3 doves) Fly up to the sky where you can soar above this town
Fly up to the sky where you can always look down
On the house where you lived and the people who love you here
Where we’ll stand on the ground and we’ll whisper our love to the air up there
Where you’ll fly, where you’ll play
Where we’ll remember your sweetness and your strength
You’ve reached out your hand to me and let me look deep in your eyes
You loved each one of us three enough to last a whole lifetime
And if it’s time to set you free, then may you go in peace
But know always that we love you, to infinity, so now
(Dove Release: flock) Fly up to the sky where you can soar above this town
Fly up to the sky where you can always look down
On the house where you lived and the people who love you here
Where we’ll stand on the ground and we’ll whisper our love to the air up there
Where you’ll fly, where you’ll play
Where we’ll remember the words you used to say:
I will be all right.
I will be okay
I am all right
I am okay
No more pain
Today
(c) 2007 Anna Huckabee Tull / Custom Crafted Songs
AN UPDATED EPILOGUE ON GIVING.
Alex Haws, 2003-2007 HOW'S THIS FOR SERENDIPITY?
I am writing this paragraph a month later--to share with you that my request, above, was answered in a most astonishing and serendipitous way--with dollars flying in from all over the United States! There are two parts of this story that I find particularly magical. The first is that men and women from all over the country wrote, sent checks, sent well wishes to the family, and when all was said and done, within two weeks, the dollar amount that had flown in the door was almost exactly (literally within five dollars) the amount needed to cover the studio costs on this song. I LOVE things like that--where the need is there and the issue is addressed, in exact balance. The second thing is that, the timing being what it was, Aimee had mailed me her first month's payment before learning that the entire cost had been covered by generous strangers. When she wrote to tell me that the check was in the mail, and I told her that the cost was covered, she was not only DELIGHTED to learn that all this help had poured in, but she was also delighted to make herself the first official donor in the "Pay It Forward" account I mentioned above. That is, Aimee and Brian's check was the check that started the (Alex-inspired) account for whoever the next person is who desperately needs a song and lacks the funding to get it up and running. How cool is THAT? Aimee felt so good to be able to pay it forward, and she has asked me to express thanks here once again to all of you who contributed, with kind words (which I forwarded to her) and with your financial support. I thank you too. You are helping me reach out to places I otherwise might not. Checks are continuing to come in. Isn't that incredible? Thank you, specifically, to Marilyn P, Sylvia P, Susan J, Jennifer R, Kristin M, Jennifer P, Keith H, Aimee H, Bonnie C, Florrie D, Kristin B, John C, Jim T and Lorraine M. You made something incredible happen and you allowing something incredible to open forward into someone none of us even knows about yet! An exciting future-song mystery yet to unravel… Thank you. As I mentioned in this month's email--I have fallen in love with my mailing list all over again!!!
I am writing this paragraph a month later--to share with you that my request, above, was answered in a most astonishing and serendipitous way--with dollars flying in from all over the United States! There are two parts of this story that I find particularly magical. The first is that men and women from all over the country wrote, sent checks, sent well wishes to the family, and when all was said and done, within two weeks, the dollar amount that had flown in the door was almost exactly (literally within five dollars) the amount needed to cover the studio costs on this song. I LOVE things like that--where the need is there and the issue is addressed, in exact balance. The second thing is that, the timing being what it was, Aimee had mailed me her first month's payment before learning that the entire cost had been covered by generous strangers. When she wrote to tell me that the check was in the mail, and I told her that the cost was covered, she was not only DELIGHTED to learn that all this help had poured in, but she was also delighted to make herself the first official donor in the "Pay It Forward" account I mentioned above. That is, Aimee and Brian's check was the check that started the (Alex-inspired) account for whoever the next person is who desperately needs a song and lacks the funding to get it up and running. How cool is THAT? Aimee felt so good to be able to pay it forward, and she has asked me to express thanks here once again to all of you who contributed, with kind words (which I forwarded to her) and with your financial support. I thank you too. You are helping me reach out to places I otherwise might not. Checks are continuing to come in. Isn't that incredible? Thank you, specifically, to Marilyn P, Sylvia P, Susan J, Jennifer R, Kristin M, Jennifer P, Keith H, Aimee H, Bonnie C, Florrie D, Kristin B, John C, Jim T and Lorraine M. You made something incredible happen and you allowing something incredible to open forward into someone none of us even knows about yet! An exciting future-song mystery yet to unravel… Thank you. As I mentioned in this month's email--I have fallen in love with my mailing list all over again!!!
Anna with sons Ben (7) and Sam (4).
Note how much my son Sam looks like Alex.
They are the same age.
Note how much my son Sam looks like Alex.
They are the same age.
© 2007 Anna Huckabee Tull. The rights for this song are filed and registered with the United States Copyright Office as a Sound Recording by Anna Huckabee Tull. Copies of these songs may not be sold or bartered. But sharing? Sharing is all good! And downloading for free? Right here right now? Go for it!
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